"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." 
— Eleanor Roosevelt

a lack of self esteem is something i've been aware of my whole life. it probably had something to do with the fact that everyone around me as a child was brutal about my weight. i couldn't even tell you the point in my life when i became uncomfortable with my body. it was probably earlier than i can remember.

as i began to grow up, it stuck with me. i was the girl who hit puberty super late, so by middle school was i, not only, overweight; i also had no chest.

when i finally got my boobs the summer between freshman and sophomore year, i finally felt more confident. but from there i only did whatever i could to emphasis my chest over the rest of my body. low cut shirts, even a shirt that said, "hi, i'm up here" on the front. the attention i got from my boobs thrilled me. but i was still very self conscious about the rest of my body.

that just carried on from there. after high school i got pregnant three times in three years and ended up 80 pounds heavier than the already self-conscious me was in high school.


my point... to this day, as a single mother to three awesome kids and someone who feels pretty accomplished in other areas of her life, i still cringe when someone sees my stomach.

i've, my whole life, let people make me feel inferior because i wasn't skinny or stunning looking. and as an adult, i'm not sure how to turn it all around. how to find the self esteem i so badly want to find.

i just wanna be good with being me. is that really too much to ask for?